Friday, October 31, 2008

redneck mardi gras

If "Mardi gras" is french for "Fat Tuesday", then "Redneck Mardi Gras" is southern for "Drunk-Ass Redneck at NASCAR".

There are two times a year when I pull down the collar and let my redneck show, both happen to coincide with NASCAR coming to Texas Motor Speedway. Odd how that is...

Every April and November Texas Motor Speedway is visited by some 250,000 people, that means a combined total of 1,500,000 teeth and 1,025,000 cases of beer. I can make fun of that since that's exactly where my happy ass will be... I average on the higher side for total number of teeth in case your wondering.

However, this doesn't mean I actually know anything about NASCAR. I don't have "my driver", I don't know the tire pressure, the temperature of the track, how important adjustments to the sway bar is or why they only make left hand turns.

What I do know is that it's a great 3 days spent with the guys where extremely loud cars go really fast, the beer flows freely and you know all 250,000 people.

At the time this posts, I'm in the process of pouring ice into a cooler and pretending I know where everyone stands in the race for the cup. For the next 3 days I'll be living in a camper with 16 other guys placing bets on the first car to pit, the first to wreck, the first to make a right hand turn and generally trying to find the bottom of my cooler.

I can't wait!

If you happen to be out at Texas Motor Speedway this weekend, drop by. I'll share a beer with you. I'll be the guy wearing a black hat around the area below or the one pulling a cooler in the infield at night - I'm sure you can find me without any problem ;)

If not, then leave me a comment. I'll get it on my redneck blackberry.

17 comments:

Deb said...

NASCAR: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

Heinous said...

I could never do it. I have beer at home. More power to you though.

Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

I know exactly what you mean--although for me it happens at outdoor music festivals.

It's sad, but it's the kind of spiritual community bonding that churches can't offer. That is, unless they keep the wine flowing and lose the organ.

ReformingGeek said...

So from all the dudes in black hats, please describe again how to pick you out of the crowd?

Maybe there's some sort of a redneck target on your hat or you're wearing beads on it? We don't want to know how you got the beads....

;-)

Traci Skene said...

Everybody should experience NASCAR. The sound and smells cannot be captured on television.

But bring earplugs. I didn't and I thought I was going to die.

Sofhal Jamil said...

Hi. How are you? It's nice to read your blog. Keep on working on it. So, I drop EC for you. Don't forget to Keep on Smiling. Salaam.

Trapped in the Office said...

Lucky you! I might make it to Texas one of these days but until then I will settle for my yearly trips to Charlotte for the Coke 600 and Indy for the Brickyard. Have a great time!

Janna said...

I'm not really into NASCAR, but I do really love Indy Car racing.
Or "Formula One," or whatever they're calling it these days.

I don't get much of an opportunity to watch it anymore, which is ironic considering I live about an hour away from MIS (Michigan International Speedway).

I feel guilty and dirty admitting this, but I love watching the wrecks. Ooohhhhh, yeah, baby. Gimme a good wreck.
In fact, I love that picture you posted of the NASCAR dudes in mid-wreck.
Getting kind of excited now.
Is it hot in here, or is it just me?

ettarose said...

Dude! You would like totally be in with the rednecks here. They eat sleep and breathe race cars. Sheesh! Right up there with football.

Rich said...

Nothing beats a guys adventure such as that. It doesn't matter if you know much about NASCAR. As long as right in the thick of things cold beer in hand!

AngieSS said...

I have grown to love NASCAR because of hubs persistence. I used to wonder why would anyone want to sit and watch cars go around and around and around. Then I saw my first crash -- I was hooked! Erm, that's kinda sick and twisted, huh?!!

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I love this event, it is my favorite of the whole year, cant wait for the next one.

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