Tuesday, October 21, 2008

tuesday rant - 7th edition

You know, up until yesterday morning I didn't have a rant living inside me.

I was coming off a great weekend, the weather is a little cooler, my pants fit and I found an ironed shirt in the closet before my mad dash to work. It was a damn trifecta. I was a calm Dad - the Dude.

Stupid-ass rock hauler crushed my dream of the perfect Monday and awoke the rant section of my brain in less than 2 seconds flat.

How is it that these trucks are allowed on the highway? Seriously, how did they get pass the department of transportation with this request:

We will be operating an 18-wheeled vehicle on the nations highways which from time-to-time will throw hard irregular shaped objects onto the road surface at speeds in excess of 80 mph with the desired effect of causing drivers following said vehicle to swerve out of their lanes to avoid said objects from landing in their laps. Further, we will place signs on said vehicles informing drivers to stay back 200 feet, however the driver must be within 50 feet to read it.

I don't blame the drivers, unless I ever see one laughing in the rear-view mirror at the carnage following him... I'm cool. I blame the damn trailer manufactures and whoever it is that invented son-of-a-bitchin rocks.

Dude, let me drive in peace so I can use my wireless device and drive with my knee like everyone else, that's all I ask. I don't need the high speed obstacle course or to see Andy my friendly windshield replacement guy again. Crap!

Smileys are an effective deterrent to swift moving objects.... try it out below.


kathcom said...

"...we will place signs on said vehicles informing drivers to stay back 200 feet, however the driver must be within 50 feet to read it."

I never thought of that. Even in your rants, there is wisdom. I am in awe.

PlancksPost said...

I believe that all 18-Wheeler trucks should be forced off the highways between the hours of 7:30-8:30 am and 4:30-5:30 pm...they cause a lot of traffic jams because they can get up and go after some jack ass cuts in front of them!

Karina Harris said...

They should just start shipping everything by plane, that will cut down a lot of truck-on-road time and then they should be restricted to only having access to certain roads at certain times of the night, not day.

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Okay, the sonofabitch who invented the rocks? Are you mad at GOD? Dude, now you're really gonna burn in hell.

And, did you take that picture while driving? Are you sure that the trailer is really the most dangerous one on the road??? Just sayin.

dadthedude said...

@kathcom - ah grasshoppuh, soon you will pluck the pebble from muh hand ;) arigato

@planckspost - I'll contact the Texas Department of Road Stuff and submit that suggestion.

@karina - whats the extra baggage fee for a load of rocks on American Airlines? Can I get it's free drink?

@texasmama - no, the son-of-a-bitchin rocks. not the sonofabitch who invented rocks (see, it's flipped). Does He hold the patent on rocks cause I knew a guy once who said he invented them. Patent infringement is a huge business ;)

you guys crack me up (windshield pun at no additional cost)

ReformingGeek said...

I collect rocks, but not what they're usually hauling. I cringe when I see one behind me. But if they were bringing me some nice huge decorative rocks for one of my yard projects, I might have to lighten up on them a bit.

Carnage in the form of dead bodies is a good description or what those trucks can do when they try to occupy the same space as a smaller vehicle. ;-)

Anonymous said...

hit happens.

Oh, I crack myself up.

Can you see clearly now?

That's it. I'm finished. OH! Wait....last one:

I tip my glass to you.

Deb said...

The technical term for those trucks is: BST (Big Scary Truck).

I don't know which is worse, being behind the BST getting stoned (in a bad way), or in front of the BST with "KCAM" being the only thing you see in the rear view.

dadthedude said...

@reforming geek - If they are driving to your house and one of those huge decorative rocks falls on my truck you owe me a beer.

@dana - dude, you were rockin there for a minute. Solid.

@deb - I held my laptop to the mirror. Damn. I get it... MACK. lol, that was good!

Grandy said...

I don't think I've used the phrase, "Bummer Dude" since high school. Somehow it seems a bit more appropriate here.

It's not just the trucks though. I had a dang motorcycle throw one at me... Or maybe it was just the driver.

Angry ex? Perhaps.

Ack...digressing again. Hope your Wednesday goes better.

ettarose said...

Dude, you are good at ranting. We should do a post together. I have not had a good rant in a while.

Shauni said...

this made me laugh, then reading the comments made me laugh more. I am now inspired to do my own weekly rant.. and being the mom of 4 teenagers imagine the rants I can come up with.

But seriously this is an issue that should be addressed. Stupid rocks!! oops i mean trailers that haul rocks